Closing

so we got a terrible computer virus the other week, and it has taken a long time to get completely removed.  It required reformatting our entire computer.

And now, we have crazy anti-virus and tracking software on our computer.   What this means is that it is now completely impossible to keep Sweets from finding this blog.  

And thus, I must stop writing.   I just don't want to risk it.   I promise, promise, promise that I will continue to read, and I will comment, but will be posting so no more.

So thank you ladies.  Thank you for your support, and kind words, and for understanding when I most needed it.

I heard a great comment the other day.

"There is no such thing as common sense.  There is good sense, but it is not common."  

Thought it was fitting.

A more well-rounded person

I am always amazed at how going through IF, and getting my legs swept from underneath me in such a way, has made me a more "vocal" person to others going through terrible situations.   I was always one of those people that, while compassionate, I never knew what to say.   Or I'd say the REALLY WRONG thing.  

Of course, I didn't realize how wrong those things were until I battled IF.

A friend that I've drifted apart from (after moving away from our last city) got some terrible news a couple of days ago.    We'll call him James.   His partner and he lived long distance from one another, and James hadn't heard from him for a couple of days.   So, he sent a friend  to check on him  and he was found dead in his apartment.  Now James is headed half way across the country to plan the funeral and bury his partner, completely unexpectedly.   It's awful, and I can't imagine going through it.

Previously, I'm sure that I would have sent a card, or flowers, and waited to hear more from James whenever he wanted to talk.    But that's not what people want when something like this happens, is it?   They don't want to call people, to have to make the effort.   I called and left James a message on his phone, just telling him that I was sorry and I was thinking of him. 

It's so simple that it should be common sense, so why isn't it?    


Baby update:

G is 5 weeks old now, and things are going really well.  She has started to smile, and has learned that when she fusses, she gets attention.   For the past two days, I have been trying to get her to sleep in her crib (and out of her bassinet) but it's not going so hot.   She sleeps for 3 minutes and then jolts awake.  There is something about the crib that just isn't comfortable.   Today, I'm waiting her out.   I will make it happen.

Picture of "G"

So normally I try to exclude any sort of identifying information on my blog because of the sensitive nature to why it was started.   Because so much of it includes Sweets, but he is not aware of the blog (to my knowledge anyway), I have tried to keep everything as anonymous as possible.   So, I'll call the new little one "G", and here's a picture...   Though I may remove this post in a few days after everyone has had a chance to view it :)

Birth Story!

My apologies!   I wrote this a week and a half ago, and hit Save instead of Publish!    Erg!

So, the birth was basically 99% easy, and 1% sheer terror.

We went in to be induced because of late gestation (41 and a half weeks) on Sept 26th at 7:30. They called us in about 6:45, but by the time we got to the hospital it was apparent that every single pregnant woman in our city had gone into labor during the 45 minutes it took us to get in the car and get to the hospital. So, they sent us away to get a good breakfast and we went back around noon, when they hooked me up to all of the IVs, pitocin, etc.

Sweets and I played travel Scrabble (possibly the coolest game ever, I highly recommend it) until I was unable, and then I got an epidural, and we watched Avatar for a few hours. Epidurals are the most wonderful invention ever. EVER. I do not understand why a person would not want to get one, cause that's just crazy.

The baby had been GREAT and after two pushes the nurse called in the doctor because she was so close to being born. But, as the doctor walked in, her heart rate crashed, and then they actually couldn't even find it. As it turned out, she had the cord wrapped around her neck, and it didn't tighten until I started to push (but usually they can tell by the fetal monitor well in advance of pushing). SO, that called for a vacuum, and an episiotomy and her being born in a total of 15 minutes and 4 more pushes. I've never seen Sweets scared like that, and I was actually trying to calm him down.
She came out looking perfect (no cone head) because she was born so quickly, and none of that bruised look that some newborns have.   And, the speed of it saved me some swelling and I have recovered pretty well.
 
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3 week update:
 
We continue to do well, and both Sweets and I feel extremely blessed.   Neither of us is taking any of it for granted, which is certainly a positive from experiencing IF.  

Due date tomorrow. Terrible news about a friend.

First, a quick update:
At my doctors appt on Wednesday I was dilated to 1.5 cm and 50% effaced.   This could mean that we may have an ontime departure tomorrow, or could mean that we'll be waiting another week for Baby Girl to make her appearance.  

I'm feeling fine, been walking in the mornings to try to speed things along.   I woke up on Wednesday to huge purple marks on my sides, and needed Sweets to tell me that they were stretch marks.  Hahahahaha.  I couldn't believe that he had to tell me what they were, AND that they happened to appear so LATE in the game!   I almost made it scott-free.  

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On more somber news, we got some REALLY bad news about a couple that we know.   Apparently their baby (pregnant at 30 weeks or so) has a tumor.   They aren't telling people about it.   He told Sweets, and then they got interrupted, so he hasn't had a chance to follow up with them.    It's pretty much bad news all around.   The baby could die at any second and really without warning.   If the baby does make it to delivery, it will have to go through surgery, and live its life without (some) major organs.

It makes me cry every time I think about it.  And I'm not a crier, except that this is so upsetting and I'm hormonal, and that's a recipe for crying.    I can't even imagine the type of stress and worry that would overshadow anything happy about a pregnancy like this.  We worried so much that something would be wrong with our baby, and were relieved that the ultrasound was free of any large abnormalities.  

And being pregnant, or soon to have a new baby, I'm nearly sure that the last thing they are going to want is to be around us.   At least, I know that's the last thing that I would want in their situations.   When dealing with IF, the last thing I wanted to do was to be around happy pregnant women.  So I'm left trying to figure out what to do.  Besides pray for them.

So, if you are a praying sort of person, I would ask that you throw a few up there for this couple.  I'd appreciate it very much.

36 weeks

My computer time has been hugely limited for the past month and a half due to VERY uncomfortable chairs in my house.   I don't have a single one that allows me to sit at the desk and type.   I realized today after my doctors appointment that it has been an insane amount of time since I posted, and that it makes me a terrible person.   I need to get a lap top, but it just isn't in the finances.

Things are still going well.   Baby Girl still doesn't have a name, and I don't think that she will until she actually makes it here.   Sweets is just too indecisive, won't pick names he actually likes, and doesn't like what I suggest.   So I'm just waiting it out for now.    All along, I have loved one specific name, which he has mocked and ridiculed until I no longer care for it.   The other day, he said that he'd be OK with it, because he'd rather I love the name, than pick something we were both ambivalent over.   I wanted to scream at him.   As it was, I just mentioned that I didn't like the name any more because of the way he'd been about it, so we'd have to find something else.   It's so frustrating.

But seriously, if this is the only thing we have to worry about, then things are good.

I feel pretty good.  I move slow, and things hurt, and I'm REALLY ready to be able to move like I used to, but I really have nothing to complain about.    Baby Girl is measuring 2 weeks ahead of schedule at 38 weeks (by gross uterine measurement) and the doctor said that we'll be having an 8.5-10 pound baby if she makes it to 40 weeks.   If longer, then we'll do measurements to make sure that she'll fit.   Im pretty tall, so 8.5-9 pounds sounds ok to me, but 10 sounds excessive, and I would seriously consider C-section at that point.

I have gained 30 pounds, and have not gained anything in the past 4 weeks.   I'm hoping to stay right at 30, because  I was about 10 pounds heavier than normal at conception.   It's much easier now because I can't eat the volumes that I was just 2 months ago, everything is so scrunched in there.

I am going to spend the next hour catching up on all your blogs!   I was reading religiously until about a month ago, so I have a lot of reading to do!